Return to Innocence: Moving Back in with Your Parents
You’re unemployed. You’re heartbroken. You flunked out of school. Your roommate had enough of your crap and gave you the boot. You’ve got no one to turn to and nowhere to go. Except…No! Can it be!? Has it finally come to this? Is it really the only way? What will your friends think? How will you feed your cat? Your ex is going to think you’re a loser! Won’t your parents be disappointed when??? When you move back in with them?!?!?!?
Take a deep breath; calm down. It’s really not that bad. You aren’t the first to make a not-so-triumphant return to your childhood bedroom, and you certainly will not be the last. Over the last five years, roughly half of 18-29 year olds have tucked their tails and done exactly what you’re doing right now and 2020 has only made that number skyrocket. Once you get past the self-loathing, you’ll realize that it’s only temporary and that your parents are way cooler than you remember. Get cozy, this is going to be a wild ride. It’s time to suck it up and return to innocence.
Déjà Vu All Over Again
Take it from someone who knows: moving back in with the parentals really isn’t the nightmare that’s playing out scene by scene in your head right now. In fact, if you’ve been living with other millennials for the last 4-5 years, it’s actually quite refreshing to be surrounded by some actual adults. They cook regular meals, keep a clean house, and generally maintain a tight schedule. They limit their drinking to cocktail hour on Friday nights and prefer board games to beer pong. Plus, if you eat all your vegetables, you get to have your old room back! Now, there might be a salty tear or two that runs down your miserable, puffy face as you slide back into those old sheets, but soon your eyes will dry and you’ll find that they fit like a glove.
Take this time to take a stroll down Nostalgia Avenue. Maybe you can dust off that old skateboard or pump up the tires on your rusting mountain bike. Listen to old CDs; read old books; flip through your old yearbooks; try on your old clothes. There’s bound to be some sweet photo albums buried deep in the garage or tucked away in the attic. You’ve spent the last several years writing the first part of your second act in life, there’s nothing wrong with flipping back to reread a few pages. Our guess is that you won’t be able to help but smile remembering that precocious former version of yourself. Soak it in; that’s the good stuff.
Don’t wait for your parents to get on your case before helping out around the house. They’ve probably been super cool about everything you’re going through, and the least you can do is wash a dish or fold a towel, especially if you aren’t working. At the very least, do no harm. Make sure that your room is clean and your bed is made. Nothing is more discouraging to a parent than discovering that their adult offspring is still a child who doesn’t have the good sense to pick up after themselves.
Better yet, go the extra mile! Your parents have worked hard their whole lives to give you and your siblings better opportunities; don’t they deserve something special? Take the weekend by the horns to show them you care. Do a full deep clean of your parents’ bathrooms and kitchen. Really get in there and get your scrub on. Another option would be to spruce up the exterior of their home. Mow the lawn, clean out the eaves troughs, lay down some mulch, and plant a few flowers. Maybe do some grocery shopping and make them a nice meal with a good wine and a chill vibe. Whatever you do, don’t do it half-assed. As your old man will likely remind you, “If something’s worth doing, it’s worth doing right!”
The fact that you’ve moved back in with your folks doesn’t speak well for your fiscal situation. If you’re licking your financial wounds, take heart! You have no idea how much money you are about to save. Assuming your parents are the pitying, benevolent type (which, let’s face it, most parents are), you’re about to live rent-free or at least rent cheap. In all likelihood, the same goes for utilities, cable, groceries, etc. If your parents are gracious enough to welcome you back into their home, they’re probably also generous enough to help you out while you get back on your feet.
Note: this is not an excuse to become a deadbeat embarrassment to the people that raised you. You owe yourself a week or two to wallow in your despair, but after that, you owe it to your parents to get your act together. They'll probably be happy to let you know when it's time to get it together. The sympathy that comes along with self-pity diminishes in direct proportion to the amount of time you sit around feeling sorry for yourself. Do your best to put a few dollars together, and show some initiative.
As you go about re-acclimating to your former stomping grounds, embrace your past and enjoy a brief reprieve from reality. But at some point, recognize that your folks aren't a piggy bank that can be smashed and glued back together. Get off the couch and take a shower. Shave your legs or your face or both, and brush your disgusting teeth. It’s time to reengage with the world. Your little siesta can get way too comfortable way to quick, but when you're ready to start fending for yourself again, visit us at Roommates.com to find the perfect match!